Trying To Survive The Last Terrible Twos Phase

Life has become pretty unbearable. The relatively easy going, will come along wherever with little fuss toddler of ours has turned into a little monster. It’s been about a month now but things seem to be at a new stage of hell in the past week. 

There’s no hiding the fact she’s always been the drama of the three, far more demanding and literally attached to my hip the majority of her little life. But something has changed in her and I’m beginning to wonder what we’ve done so wrong to create such a terror.

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For a good five to six months she has become quite rude to people, even her Grandparents, where she spits (more of blowing a raspberry) and scowls with the added shouting of “no” if they come near her, talk to her or try to pick her up. This includes other children and it’s quite embarrassing. I put it down to her learning to be possessive because of her sisters and that it would be a phase short lived, but it’s not. It’s her, it’s her own attitude and it’s only getting worse.

She’s very clingy yet fiercely independent in her own decisions. Everything she does has to be on her own terms, we cannot ask her to do something without it causing a huge tantrum. And that leads me on to the actual tantrums. I thought at first it was terrible twos, but I’m not entirely convinced. One day in particular earlier in the week was horrific. She was having a full blown meltdown every ten to fifteen minutes.

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I think we need to introduce some sort of discipline now. She’s nearly two and seems to have got her own way far too much. The issue with telling her off is that we are technically fuelling the tantrum and most of the meltdowns aren’t really her being naughty it’s just her way of expressing that she’s unhappy with something. Which is perfectly fine in her world, but for me I am increasingly drained by her.

I think that she would really benefit from attending nursery already. Giving her independence and a sense of routine with rules with people qualified to deal with tantrums because I certainly don’t know how to! I don’t remember the others being this awful and that scares me slightly. She’s got the makings to be a little terror. The nursery that P2 attends only does one intake so we have to wait until September 2017 when she’s nearly three for her to start. 

I’m contemplating finding a temporary one for a couple of mornings a week before that though as I’m getting pretty desperate for some space from all the meltdowns each day, all day. I feel so much mum guilt for thinking this way but I just don’t know how to help her adjust and find herself better.

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20 comments

  1. Aw hun I’m sure it is just a phase that will pass, hope your okay that age is never easy is it! xx

  2. Oh the terrible twos…. Don’t let me get started with the fxxxxing threes, he he! I have a 2 year old and a 3 year old at home, so we’re right in it. Mornings can be quite stressful when I try to take my older 2 to school. I’m so glad the summer holidays started today!

  3. It’s such a difficult age. My daughter is 3 and still doesn’t seem to have come out of it yet. She is wonderful when she’s in nursery (typical). Hope it improves soon

  4. Oh the terrible twos…and it’s not the end of it. My nearly 4 year old is terrible behaving lately. He’s acting like a complete baby and crying over everything. It’s really annoying.

  5. I totally sympathise with you on this one!!!!! My little one is nearly 3 and I think they get worse the nearer to 3 she gets. She’s recently saying “yuk daddy’s disgusting” every time he goes to cuddle her or kiss her goodbye or goodnight. And then the tantrums and meltdowns. GAH!!! Today I took get to get a pair of shoes and she had the biggest melt down in the shop and I had to physically pin her down whilst we tried shoes on her. I wouldn’t have bothered normally but she had gone up an entire whole size in 2 months and was desperate for new shoes. Toddler life isn’t easy, but the fact that they still want cuddles and to hold your hand makes up for the hard times xxx

    • Oh I completely agree. I try to ignore it as much as I can but the reality is that it’s super hard to ignore screaming in your ear.

  6. I agree with the others that she may be better once she language improves, she sounds like she is getting frustrated. We did signing and I think that helped so much with helping them get their feelings across to you. Could sign what they wanted, it didn’t delay their speech at all, as you always say the word as well as signing it. It worked really well for us, and its worth a try.

  7. Hello Beautiful Bear

    I’m sure it’s just a phase but you know that already clearly lovely. It’s good that you can see her side but yes, it must be so exhausting. I have a 17-month old who can go through periods like this for a week or two and it’s awful to see and hard to deal with so 5/6 months must be hellish!
    I’d definitely say a short stint in nursery every week sounds like a good idea to give her some routine and you a break (we want this for Lily too sometime soon, money permitting!) and as for discipline, I’ve no idea, I’m crap at that but I’ve heard people say ignoring it (if you can) seems to be the way forward?
    Wishing you the best of luck and let me know how you get on
    X X

  8. Oh bless you – it’s such a hard age isn’t it. Toddler meltdowns are so difficult to deal with, especially when they can’t communicate properly yet. I definitely think nursery would be a good idea. Little I absolutely loves hers! x

    • We’re struggling to find one for the hours we want. It’s so frustrating. She needs some time away from us

  9. I have thought about my two year old going to nursery now too. She would benefit a lot from it – its just the price of it 🙁

  10. Oh wow, it is hard especially when it’s ongoing. I think nursery would be a good idea. Ours was quite difficult but literally over night with more language he’s really calmed down and is able to express himself much better.

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