Growing up I don’t think food was really my friend. I’d turn my nose up at anything remotely odd looking or smelling without even actually tasting it. I wouldn’t dare to touch a pepperoni pizza or a Chinese, let alone Curry or even fruit. I was always the reason we chose certain restaurants or had certain things for dinner and I see now, that I was probably the biggest pain imaginable.
When I met my hubby and I think I’ve mentioned this before on my blog, I used to have to send a list of the foods I liked if I ever stayed over at his house or went there for the day. The list consisted of things like chicken nuggets, chips, jacket potato, chicken pie (but only the gravy version) and a cheese pizza. God forbid if something like a casserole with rice was to be placed in front of me. But I’d eat it to be polite. The whole situation was incredibly immature when I look back at it.
Move on four years and I am a completely changed person. Food is still not my friend because I have become the opposite to my previous self. I love food. I have finally started to enjoy food but I enjoy it so much that it’s become a bit of a problem for me. I look at my naked self in the mirror and I can’t see me anymore. I see a wobbly, things going south, ageing woman. I’m not really a spring chicken anymore and that kind of terrifies me.
So the past few weeks I have started to use my new found love for food to create better choices for my body. I’ve dieted with Juice Plus and failed so this time I know I need more of a permanent fixture. A better lifestyle I suppose. When we went to Asda recently I found myself naturally picking better food choices and every morning I am making a healthy breakfast to enjoy.
Part of me is interested in becoming vegetarian or even vegan if I’m honest but I think that this is a bigger challenge than I am willing to take on, especially as my Hubby wouldn’t be on the same page as me so it would make things very expensive and inconvenient for us as a family. But the principle of being healthier and caring for my body is still there. Every time I look in the mirror it’s a constant reminder of who I don’t want to be and there’s only one person who can change it.
It frustrates me when people laugh at my goal and that’s because I’m not exactly fat. I just have this image of who I want to be and who I am now. They are completely different. I want to be healthy on the inside and slim on the outside. To be honest I am jealous of my eldest daughter who is literally skin and bone. I feel happiest when I am wearing tight things as it gives me confidence and right now all I wear is baggy, floaty items that don’t really do my petite stature any favours.
So I am on a mission this summer to be healthy and skinny by Christmas. Mainly tackling my chunky thighs and my wobbly tummy. Wish me luck!