“I’ve known about it for a while and it’s nothing serious at all”

I read other blogs every day and recently I read this very inspiring one from Along Came Cherry and a specific paragraph really stayed with me:

If my kids are playing up then there is always a reason, either something has upset them or something is going on with me. If I’m pre-occupied with some work that needs doing then they know that and it affects how they behave.

Since I read that I’ve been watching my girls and thinking about my own mood and actions a lot more than I previously did. Yesterday, I experienced an example of this as I woke relatively happy and so did the girls. As the day wore on I became a monster. I felt short tempered, the children were demanding and literally grabbing me every few minutes.

I knew I was effecting them deep down but I just couldn’t shake my own awful mood off. Inside I’m screaming. Tomorrow at 12:30 I’m being admitted for an operation. I’ve known about it for a while and it’s nothing serious at all, in fact I’ll be home by the evening, but I’ve got to be sedated. That’s the thing that is terrifying me.

It’s not the procedure that has its risks, it’s the sedation. I have absolutely no idea what it feels like to be sedated. I’ve done my googling, I’ve asked my friends and family who have all reassured me that it’s just like falling asleep only it feels like no time has passed at all when really it’s been a few hours. You also feel like you’re hungover. I can deal with that I think, but it still doesn’t stop the way I feel. Absolutely petrified.

So when the kids are grabbing and pulling at me every second of the day, I snap. It grates on me which in turn switches my girls from happy angels into little devils. I wish I could just switch off my feelings in the lead up to this operation but unfortunately doesn’t work that way. And so I continue to have naughty children because of myself, not because of them, until Friday when the op will be over and I’ll have nothing to be so concerned about.

Are your kids naughty when you are feeling down/tired/hormonal?

  

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4 comments

  1. Thanks so much for mentioning me and I can totally understand why you are worried, I would be. I’ve never been sedated before but I have had two operations in the last year where I’ve been put to sleep and the 1st time I was terrified but it wasn’t bad at all. Hope it all goes well.

    I think the hardest part of parenting isn’t the kids but trying to be aware of my own mood and finding ways to deal with it when I do feel stressed, for me a really hard time is when I’m pre-menstrual. This week is really stressful too as we are having some work done in our house and for two days have all been upstairs, the kids have been bored and I’ve had cabin fever so it’s been hard to stay calm. It’s impossible to be happy all the time but I think being aware makes a big difference and helps to me more understanding towards the kids 🙂 x

    • lifewithpinkprincesses

      You are completely right. My mood completely effects the girls. It’s awful and I feel so guilty to admit it. They deserve better.

  2. I don’t like the thought of sedation either, so I can understand how you feel. Hopefully it won’t be too bad. I think it’s one of those things where the worrying is worse than the actuality.

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